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Recently a cancer caregiver reached out to me via my blog wanting to share the story of his wife's battle with cancer. Diagnosed with mesothelioma in 2005, she was given 3-12 months to live. It has now been 7 1/2 years since her diagnosis and she is doing great! I love hearing stories of hope like this since I have a cancer that is considered "incurable", and I've been given little hope of living a long and cancer free life. This doesn't mean though that I do not have hope - I am filled with hope that I will some day be cancer free and I'm doing what I can to prepare for that to happen. People beat the odds with cancer everyday, so why can't I?
Hope in a Difficult Situation
My wife Heather and I will always have the date November 21, 2005 etched into our minds. Unfortunately, this was the day that Heather was diagnosed with malignant pleural mesothelioma, and it was the day I began the job of caring for a cancer patient. Three months prior to Heather’s diagnosis, we celebrated the birth of our daughter Lily. We were looking forward to her first Christmas with us, but instead of celebrating that year, we began a fight to save Heather’s life.
Even before we left the doctor’s office, I understood how difficult my new job would be. After our doctor gave us a little background about mesothelioma, he informed us of our treatment options. We could either go to a local hospital, a regional hospital, or a mesothelioma specialist in Boston. We opted to go with Dr. David Sugarbaker, the mesothelioma specialist. I knew that if my wife were to have any chance of surviving this disease, she would need the best care possible. I could only pray that this specialist in Boston could help her.
My wife Heather and I will always have the date November 21, 2005 etched into our minds. Unfortunately, this was the day that Heather was diagnosed with malignant pleural mesothelioma, and it was the day I began the job of caring for a cancer patient. Three months prior to Heather’s diagnosis, we celebrated the birth of our daughter Lily. We were looking forward to her first Christmas with us, but instead of celebrating that year, we began a fight to save Heather’s life.
Even before we left the doctor’s office, I understood how difficult my new job would be. After our doctor gave us a little background about mesothelioma, he informed us of our treatment options. We could either go to a local hospital, a regional hospital, or a mesothelioma specialist in Boston. We opted to go with Dr. David Sugarbaker, the mesothelioma specialist. I knew that if my wife were to have any chance of surviving this disease, she would need the best care possible. I could only pray that this specialist in Boston could help her.
Over the next two
months, our lives were turned upside down. Before Heather was diagnosed with
this awful disease, we both held full-time jobs. After the diagnosis, Heather
could not work, and I could only work part-time. I also was responsible for
Heather and our daughter Lily. This was an overwhelming experience, and I often
found myself dwelling on the worst case scenario, despite my best efforts to
stay positive. I often feared that Heather would die, we would become broke,
and I would have to raise Lily all alone. As a result, I would often break down
and cry alone. But, whenever I was around Heather, I would never shed a tear. I
knew that Heather depended on me to be the strong one, and the last thing she
needed was to see my fears.
Heather and I had many family, friends, and even strangers to help us during this time. Many offered comforting words, and others offered financial assistance. I always encourage other cancer caregivers to use all the help that is offered to them. It will allow you to realize that you are not going through this by yourself, but you have people who care about you.
Being a cancer caregiver is an extremely difficult job, and you will definitely experience many different negative emotions. However, this is a job that you cannot simply quit; therefore, you have to remember to hold on to the hope that everything will get better.
The odds were against Heather, but after months of painful treatments, she beat this disease. It has been seven years since she was diagnosed with mesothelioma, but Heather is still cancer free today.
After going through this situation, I understand how precious every minute can be. Two years after Heather’s diagnosis, I found myself working full-time, caring for our daughter, and being a full-time Information Technology student.
Being a cancer caregiver prepared me to return to school. I had learned a lot about stress and time management, and with those skills I graduated with high honors and was asked to be a graduation speaker. During my graduation speech, I told the audience and my classmates that five years earlier, I would have never dreamed that my life would turn out as it did. My wife taught me that within each of us is the strength to accomplish incredible things. As long as we believe in ourselves, and never stop fighting, we can achieve anything.
Heather and I had many family, friends, and even strangers to help us during this time. Many offered comforting words, and others offered financial assistance. I always encourage other cancer caregivers to use all the help that is offered to them. It will allow you to realize that you are not going through this by yourself, but you have people who care about you.
Being a cancer caregiver is an extremely difficult job, and you will definitely experience many different negative emotions. However, this is a job that you cannot simply quit; therefore, you have to remember to hold on to the hope that everything will get better.
The odds were against Heather, but after months of painful treatments, she beat this disease. It has been seven years since she was diagnosed with mesothelioma, but Heather is still cancer free today.
After going through this situation, I understand how precious every minute can be. Two years after Heather’s diagnosis, I found myself working full-time, caring for our daughter, and being a full-time Information Technology student.
Being a cancer caregiver prepared me to return to school. I had learned a lot about stress and time management, and with those skills I graduated with high honors and was asked to be a graduation speaker. During my graduation speech, I told the audience and my classmates that five years earlier, I would have never dreamed that my life would turn out as it did. My wife taught me that within each of us is the strength to accomplish incredible things. As long as we believe in ourselves, and never stop fighting, we can achieve anything.
- Cameron
1 comments:
Great post! Very hopeful and encouraging even through some very tough times. I was my mom's primary cancer caregiver. Unfortunately she passed away and it was very difficult to take care of her during her last days. What people need to remember is that the caregiver needs to take care of themselves too. They need respite help. The stress of the ordeal caused me some anxiety attacks and issues for about a year afterwards.
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