Facing Fears

Fears, we all have them right? My life is full of fears. I'm afraid of large dogs, flying, tripping down the stairs, burning myself, drowning, bugs, speaking in front of large groups, my parents dying, having an asthma attack, crying in public, getting dirty, germs, catching a cold/flu, etc, etc. I have a lot of fears, several of which I conquered (kinda) by entering the world of triathlon and open water swimming. I don't like water, being cold, being wet, and I'm a major germ freak. Nothing about open water swimming is conducive to my neurosis. Yet, I did it! Last year I thought that getting past the open water swim was my biggest obstacle in the triathlon. But I was wrong ... Enter clipless pedals. 

Clipping In

I am the proud owner of a road bike thanks to the generosity of my Dad and David this past Christmas! I have a Specialized Dolce which is an entry level women's road bike. Upon getting the bike I also purchased cycling shoes, cleats, and clipless pedals. The purpose of clipless pedals is to allow you to "lock in" to the pedal and have seamless movement with the pedal, with both the push and the pull of your leg stroke engaging in a strong motion. I had heard from many people that they had all had "zero-speed bike crashes" and knew that one would probably be in my future, but I had no idea what a significant event that would be.

The Bike Crash

Back in January after I bought my bike, shoes, and pedals, David and I headed out to Mission Bay to go for a bike ride and allow me to practice clipping in and out of the pedals. After about 5 minutes of practicing I had my first zero-speed crash, followed soon by my second. Its hard at first to remember your shoes are attached to the bike! We left Mission Bay with me crying and my wrists and elbows getting sorer by the minute. By the time we got home, I couldn't bend either elbow. I really started freaking out and about an hour later we were in Urgent Care and I was sobbing on the x-ray table. Oh what a fun day. It turns out I seriously bruised my wrists, forearms, and elbows, and I had a tiny fracture on my right elbow. As a result of this I couldn't bend either arm, bear weight on my arms, and I was suddenly rendered helpless. I took two days off work (on prescription painkillers and sleeping most of the days away) while David played nurse, and  I thanked my lucky stars that he was there and able to care for me. If not, I seriously would have had to call my dad and ask him to fly down from SF to take care of me. I couldn't even open a door or take the cap off    the prescription bottle much less feed myself or take care of my dogs! :o(  This whole experience left me traumatized and terrified of my bike.

 

Getting Back on the Bike

My training schedule had two days of biking on it -  one day of spinning mid-week,and one day of riding on the weekend. Well, these bike rides never happened. As week after week rolled by, I missed ride after ride. I finally went for one training ride the week before my 3rd tri, with a fellow GOTR coach, but wussed out at the last minute and biked in my  running shoes. Yes, on clipless pedals. That sucked! Finally it was time for my next triathlon, a club race with the Tri Club of San Diego. Eeek!
 

 

Triathlon #3 - Tri Club Race

My 2nd tri ever was a club race back in November. (More on my blog Triathlon #2 - The Sprint) One of the many incredible benefits of the tri club is their free chip-timed races! This race would be the same route and distance as the last, yet suddenly I was nervous about getting back into the ocean, and I was worrying over the decision of trying to clip into my bike or not. When it came down to going to the bike store to have cage pedals put on or learning how to clip into my bike ... laziness won. (I didn't want to have to drive down to the store, explain the situation, get the pedals changed, etc.) Instead I sucked it up and spent 30 minutes in the park  near my house practicing clipping in and out. After about 20 successful attempts I felt that I had it down and committed to try it the next day in the race.

 

The Swim

I hadn't been in the ocean in five months and was so scared of the swim the next morning! I had been swimming laps at the pool but it is so different to look out at a faraway buoy in the ocean versus doing  repetitive short distance laps in the pool. I freaked out a bit in the beginning of the swim and started having what felt like an asthma attack, but managed to pull it together and finish the swim with some decency. Whew!

The Bike

My bike ride experience in club race number two was just like number one. I was passed by everyone and passed no one. When I complained to David about this later he asked me "Well, how many training rides did you go on? One right? What did you expect? You'll get better with practice". For some reason I thought that being a good runner meant that those muscles and strengths would transfer over to biking. Well they don't! Shoot.

 

The Run

Oh running, how I love thee! I'm so glad that running is the last leg of the triathlon,because it gives me something to look forward to. By the time I started my run most of the other participants were done racing and were enjoying the hot breakfast buffet. :o( I started off on my run (noticing once again how weird it feels to run after biking) and blasted out the first half mile at a 7:00 pace. I knew this wasn't sustainable and slowed down a bit, but was surprised to see that I was still running a sub 8:00 mile and feeling quite all right! The run course was two loops around the island, meaning that as I finished my first lap I got to see even more people finishing and eating breakfast. ARGH! I gave the run all I had on the second lap and finally crossed the finish line a triathlete once again. Accomplished, disappointed,  proud, sad, and frustrated. So many emotions!

20 Miler - DOH!

Oh yeah, and that weekend I was scheduled for a 20 mile run before I signed up for this race. So the next day (after much waffling about flaking), I headed out and gave the run what I had left. I didn't make it through 20 miles, but I was able to run 17 which was pretty darn good in my book!

Race Results

A few days later the results were posted and I was horrified to see my times. I was so slow! Mostly due to my crappy bike times, but it was a blow to the ego to know that as a decent runner I was a terrible triathlete. I didn't take this sitting down though, and all it has made me want to do is go out and train harder and improve. I've managed to slowly improve over the years with running, and I intend to do the same in the triathlon. I never thought I could do this, and now all I want to do is do this better. My goal this year is to increase in distance and intensity, and who knows, maybe a few years from now I'll be laughing over the time when I was afraid to do open water swims or to clip into my bike. Wouldn't that be so great? :o)